The perfect day. The cold air had slowly started to fade. The sun shining on your face, the crisp breeze, the smell of fresh blooming flowers. This was Charlie’s favorite part of being a part of this type of work. Charlie loved when they were shooting on location, but only when it wasn’t winter. Charlie was bumped up from intern to assistant to the director.
He was so thrilled when he was the one that actually got the job. Nothing back then was going right for him. He was happy that at least one thing worked out. The show Charlie was working on was a comedy, but it had some romantic elements to it.
Girl loses her job, gets dumped in the same day, and then her low life brother moves in with her. Girl then meets hunk, falls in love with him but he doesn’t know it. The storyline then builds from there.
Charlie kind of felt a connection to this story, but he needed to keep feelings out of it. The director was very strict about that. “You can’t let your emotions get the best of you when you’re filming Charlie.”
Charlie eyebrows furrowed and asked, “But why? Aren’t you supposed to feel something when you watch the scene? Isn’t that how you know the audience will believe it?”
The director looked at him with shallow eyes, and said, “You can’t have your emotions in the way or else you get too involved with everything, meanwhile you are just directing these people. Take it from me Charlie, keep emotion out of it.”
On their way back to the studio to see what they had, Charlie ran into the studio’s “confidant,” as he called her. Charlie didn’t really like to call her a psychologist because he had always associated psychologists with insane people, or people who don’t know how to deal with things.
“How are you Charlie?” she said.
She glared at him like he was a lost puppy in the rain with the most non sympathetic voice.
“I’m fine, just another day at the office.” said Charlie.
A bead of sweat came down Charlie’s forehead.
“Come see me in my office later on today.” she said demandingly.
Charlie huffed as he was walking towards her office. While he walked in, there was a smell of mothballs, and cats mixed together. She didn’t even have cats or knows how to cook.
He had never really been in her office before, so as he was walking in his eyes roamed the room, drinking in all the different plaques on the wall, all saying she was a certified psychologist, from all these universities and fancy places.
Charlie’s heart felt like it was ready to give out, his lungs started tightening, his palms were glistening. He started loosening his tie right as she walked in.
He took a deep breath in through his nose, and silently let it out through his mouth. The “confidant” squinted her eyes and furrowed her eyebrows together and asked, “What’s going on in Charlie’s life? Huh? Tell me.” “I assure you everything is confidential between us Charles.”
He started saying that nothing much was really going on. He got his dream job. Working on a TV set. His life is going good. No complications. No drama. No nothing.
He had his mouth open as if ready to speak. Charlie was about to talk about Dani, she was always on his mind, whether he liked it or not.
All he could think about was that day he saw her again for the first time after they graduated high school. It had seemed like the world has gone into slow motion, her hair strawberry blonde, eyes as blue as the Hawaiian ocean, and that smile, that smile could light up the world.
His mind went back to the exact moment she told him she was getting married. His eyes swam in darkness and his lips were chapped, and he started to feel himself sweat. The “confidant” looked at him and asked if he was alright.
He shook his head head to get out of the memory, but the image of her face was still there. Dani would simply not go away.
He quickly came out of that state of mind, and left in a rush telling the “confidant”, that he needs to go do something really important. He couldn’t really think of any excuse. He got into his car and right away felt a panic attack coming on.
Why did I have to go back to thinking about her. Ugh, damn, now I can’t stop. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
Charlie kept slightly hitting his head against the steering wheel to try to get that image of her out of his head. In that moment every song on the radio reminded him somehow of Dani. Charlie then closed his eyes and tried to breath to calm himself down.